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Never Enough Time

Since applying for the Peace Corps a mere 16 days ago, my life has taken a radical change in direction and I feel like I have no time left! 

As anyone that knows me will attest, I truly believe that things happen for a reason and when it is the right time. When something is meant to be, it will flow, and when it isn’t, there will be one delay after another. I have been wrestling with my next steps for over a year now. 

Through it all, I always knew my time in Charleston was transient. I have made friends, found work, and embraced new loves. This place has given me the opportunity to work through my goals, mindsets, dreams, and sorrows. In some cases, it felt like a tortuous purgatory. Yet, like anything life-altering and painful, there was so much growth. 

This time of reflection culminated in my month spent working in St Thomas. It was there that I was finally able to gain some clarity and begin looking to the future. I realized that my fantasies of what could be would never come to pass without action on my part. 

I could very easily stay in Charleston and find a permanent home. Massage therapy work is plentiful and lucrative by Charleston standards. I could have a very contented life. The problem is, I am not made that way. I have a restlessness and desire for adventure and meaning that will never allow me to settle into peaceful bliss. So, upon my return to Charleston, I finally completed my Peace Corps application. 

That was all I needed to do to irrevocably change everything. In the past 16 days, I have committed to 26 months in Africa. This decision has overtaken my schedule. My To-Do list is filled with medical and dental exams, fingerprinting, paperwork, multiple trips to the Post Office, and phone calls and emails. 

Even though my leave date is not until April, I have realized just how little time I have left to do all of the things that I need to do. It’s not just the big things for the Peace Corps, it’s the little things like preparing to step out of my life for two years. The time that seemed to stretch on in dreadful monotony has now sped up to the point that I am just holding onand trying to cherish every moment left. 

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