I learned a lesson over the past few years. If you keep running into obstacles, it is God’s way of telling you that you’re following the wrong path. When things are moving smoothly, you know you’re heading in the right direction. In most of my life, I have been able to heed this lesson, save one.
I have been in a tumultuous and erratic relationship for nearly 7 years. It has been passionate, loving, exciting, exhausting, and wild. We have come together, broken apart, reconciled, fought, reconciled, fought, reconciled and broken up again.
I love him. I have never had this kind of a relationship before. I’ve been married and divorced twice and not had this level of drama. We just cannot seem to communicate.
My friends and family have long since given up on trying to analyze, defend, or explain our “relationship.” There is certainly tenderness and affection between us, but there is also this seemingly insurmountable rift that looms large over our every encounter.
At this point, I honestly have no idea what to do. We are living as neighbors, in each of our respective RVs, but I will need to move on when I get my financial affairs in order. I do not know where to go. I have 2 pittbulls, who are small, kind, sociable and loving. It infuriates me that I live in my own “home” in an RV, and many parks and communities won’t let me move in because of breed restrictions. I would like to buy a small piece of property, but many communities have issues with living in RVs.
I also have no idea where I want to live. I have my massage license in FL, so if I stay here, I’ll be able to work, but if I leave, I will need to apply, spend money, and wait until I get a new license in another place.
I’m doing a lot of praying right now. I’m not desperate, but it is nearing the time that for both of our sakes, we need to move on. I just feel a bit lost right now. Hopefully, God will show me the way soon.
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